Tag: #problems

All you have to do is ask.

Today in my readings Paul talks about “…behaving decently, as in the daytime” Romans 13:13.  And I’m not going to say anything new here, but sometimes it bears repeating, it helps to be reminded.  How many of us exhibit behaviours in the privacy of our own homes, behind the closed doors of hotel rooms, or it the darkened anonymity of bars and night clubs, behaviours that we would never want our mothers, our children, our friends to see.  That’s what Paul is talking about. And he’s not just talking about our physical deeds, but our emotional ones as well, the ones we keep secret in our hearts, the jealousies, the coveting, the dissensions and grievances.

I will be the first one to admit that there are things I might say or do in my own house that I would never want other people to see or hear.  Losing my temper, slamming doors, speaking badly of someone.  I do them all.  I forget that someone is always watching.  That my actions never occur in a vacuum.  That’s why Paul’s words are so important.  In this letter to the Romans he is calling on them, on us, to “put aside the deeds of darkness, and put on the armor of light”.  Are you asking yourself how?  Or have you convinced yourself that your behaviours in those times were justified, or that they drove you to it.  That they deserved what they got or that’s just how you were made.

I won’t even tell you that those things aren’t true. But part of what Paul is telling us, part of the message of Jesus, and the reason he died for us and our sins is that we are called to be better.  To rise up against our own sinful nature, “the way we were made” and put aside the deeds of darkness.  If you’re like me, maybe you’ve tried this before, but feel as if you always slip back, you always fall down and maybe you’ve even reached the point of giving up. I can relate.  But today I’d like to tell you that we are supposed to fail, in fact we will fail every single time if we are trying to go it alone.  I have come to learn that the absolute only way I can be a different person is through Christ.  Time and time again the bible calls upon us to surrender ourselves to our Father in heaven.  But we are so stubborn, so determined to have our independence that we refuse, we protest the freedom and light that is offered to us freely.  But that’s okay.  Because our time here on earth is about that journey.  About gaining a gradual understanding of the power of the life and death and love of Jesus Christ and God our Father.

So if there is a darkness in your heart or a heaviness in your spirit, know that you don’t have to shine a light on it yourself, you don’t have to carry the burden, because there is someone greater than you who will happily do it for you.  Someone who wants to do it for you.  All you have to do is ask.

God bless,

Meredith

More of You

On Tuesday I wrote about feeling overwhelmed and weighed down by my every growing list of obligations and responsibilities.  I also wrote about how much I need to lean on God to help me.  He has given me all of these blessings, not to be a burden, but to use these opportunities to lift him up and he will never give me more than I can handle.

I’m not going to say that I’m feeling less anxious, in fact last night I was feeling particularly overwhelmed and it was suggested that this blog was the first thing that needed to go.  I don’t think that’s part of God’s plan, I get a lot out of writing it.  I’m just going to keep praying for strength and stamina and remembering that these “obligations” are actually blessings and opportunities.  That being said, it does mean that today’s post isn’t going to be a long one but I wanted to share this song with you.  It lifted me up yesterday and reminded me of what is important and I hope it does that for you today as well.

God bless,

Meredith

The Weight of the World.

We all have times in our lives when we feel anxiety and stress.  Times when the obligations and worries of the world, and our lives seem to pile up and become overwhelming.  Times when we feel as if we are not strong enough to carry the weight that is on our shoulders.  I’ve been feeling that way recently.  That there is so much to be done, and not enough of me to do it all.  There are people in my life for whom I have a great deal of fear and worry.  In the past, when I’ve had those feelings, I have often struggled to drag myself out from under the mental and emotional pressures I have placed upon myself.  I have felt like a failure.  I have railed against God and the challenges he has laid upon me and those I love.

What makes this time any different?  Trust.  In those times when I begin to feel my burdens pulling me under, I have a lifeline that I can reach out and grab.  Jesus.  Sometimes it’s all I can do to repeat “Jesus help me” over and over again.  Sometimes I  plead for a miracle, but trust that however God chooses to answer my prayer, he loves me and those whom I pray for, and this is all part of his plan.  And I remind myself that my Father in heaven has my back and he will not give me anything I can’t handle, as long as I take His hand and believe that he is with me.

Doing all those things doesn’t mean that the feelings of panic go away forever or completely, but they lessen. My relationship with God has grown to a point that I will not, can not help but turn to him in all times and in all places.   Even in my struggles, I see the blessings and joy his has given me.  He will walk through the valley with me, and when I know I am not strong enough, he is my strength and my shield.  He will carry me when I can not walk the path on my own.

Trust in the Lord, with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. Proverbs 3:5.

The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms…” Deuteronomy 33:27.

The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him. Psalm 28:7

God bless,

Meredith

Making Your Own Luck.

Last night David and I were having a discussion about luck.  I was telling him how grateful I felt that a friend’s life was saved from what could have been a devastating and potentially fatal condition, and his response was that she was lucky.

Yesterday I wrote about giving up control of your life to Jesus, and I think that this idea of getting lucky is, in many ways, part of that.  Personally, I no longer believe in luck.  If I get a green light, that is a blessing from God; an amazing parking spot? Thank you, Jesus.  Why is it so much easier for us to believe that good things happen by random chance than it is to believe that something good happened because we have a Father in heaven who loves us and wants what’s best for us?

I think that part of the reason is something many struggle with, because good things happen to bad people, and bad things happen to good people.  And it’s hard to understand how a loving Father could give a good mother cancer, or see a father killed in a car accident.  And bad things don’t just happen to good people, they happen to Christians and non-believers alike, they happen to innocent children.

I’ll be the first to admit that I don’t have all the answers here and this was something that David and I discussed, and I’m sure we’ll have more discussions about.  But here’s what I know from my own life experience.  When my oldest son was born I was filled with so many hopes and joys and expectations for who and what he would become.  Never once could I have imagined the road God put me on with him.  We have been through multiple diagnoses, traumatic brain injuries, self-abuse, staff abuse, and so many tears.  For many, many years I couldn’t understand why God gave me a son with so many challenges. At times I thought it was a punishment, at others I simply turned my back on God.  What I couldn’t see, while I was down in the trenches, when I was walking through the valley, was God’s bigger plan.  I didn’t see how Hayden’s brain injury would result in his eventual transition to a community home where he would be given incredible support.  I didn’t see how this would result in our family actually becoming a family again, instead of a single parent household while the other parent managed and cared exclusively for Hayden.  I didn’t see how this would give me the chance to simply be Hayden’s mother again instead of constantly focusing on therapies and treatments and then being too exhausted for anything more.  God has a plan for each and every one of us and I believe that the more we thank Him for our blessings, the more we reach out and try to have a relationship with Him…the more we find ourselves able to trust in Him and his plan for us.

I have no idea the ripple effect my son Hayden has in the lives of those he meets, and interacts with on a daily basis at school, in the community, in his own home.  There are still many days when all I can do is give him to God, trust in God and his plan for Hayden, for our family, for me.   I do know that I no longer believe anything in my life is a result of chance.  If I choose to believe in a God who was capable of creating the heavens and the earth, who can bring the dead to life, how can I not believe in a creator who is capable of watching over me in my daily life.

And I guess that brings us back to where we started. In the end it always comes down to the same thing; the reason there is good and bad in this world…choice or free-will.  You can choose to believe that the good things that happen to you are good luck, and the bad things similarly, or you can choose to believe that the good things that happen to you are blessings from a loving Father and the bad things?  Challenges, opportunities for growth, doors opening to new chapters you couldn’t imagine were possible.  Sometimes to climb a mountain you have to walk through a valley.  Maybe the meaning of life is as simple as choice, and if it is, I know God wants you to choose Him.

God bless,

Meredith