Tag: #love

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I’ll pray for you.

Social media has made it possible for us to connect with so many more people than was once possible. One aspect of that connection is learning about the struggles and trails that people often share. I think the most common one I’ve seen is someone going into surgery, asking for prayers and good vibes, or the loss of a loved one. How many times have you typed a response to one of these posts with the words “I’ll pray for you” or “sending prayers” or used the little prayer hands emoji? How many times have you actually followed through?

I’m guilty of it myself at times. Seeing someone going through something, I say I’ll pray for them, but then I get distracted and life is busy and I forget, or I make a distracted attempt and then move on. I never actually, meaningfully offer a prayer to God for that person.

How many times as a parent have I told my kids that actions speak louder than words? and yet in my own relationship with God I’ve offered so many empty promises of prayer. I can’t tell you what changed for me, or why, but something in my heart did. I found myself making a commitment to God, to actually take a moment, to sit and meaningfully pray. To spend time with God, praying, for any person who asks for prayer on my social media or in my life. If I say I’m going to pray for you. I’m actually doing it. You lost a cat and ask for prayers? I’m praying for you. Surgery? I’m praying for you. Lost someone? I’m reaching out in prayer for you and your family.

What has surprised me in all of this has been an unexpected consequence. I’ve grown closer to God myself. I feel him reaching out to me, touching my heart in those times when I’m reaching out to him for someone else.

Maybe you’re better at follow through than I was, but if you aren’t, then I encourage you to try it. The next time you write that you are praying for someone, or post a prayer hand emoji, STOP, take a moment, bow your head and meaningfully, heartfully offer up your petition for that person. You might be surprised at what you get back in return.

God bless,

Meredith

Sometimes you need a Karen.

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Out of my distress I called on the Lord; the Lord answered me and set me free. The Lord is on my side; I will not fear. Psalm 118:5-6

God always answers prayers, sometimes it just takes a bit for us to recognize that.

It’s been busy times here on the farm. For the most part, I’ve been incredibly grateful for the subzero temperatures; frozen ground means no mud. The snow on the ground looks beautiful too. And then the thaw came…

We’ve got water management problems on our property after all of the building and landscape changes we’ve done this year. Solving that, and putting in some drainage tile is absolutely on our list for 2022. But that doesn’t help right now. Last week we had a major warm up (loved it) and then some rain (oh no!). All of that on frozen ground meant a lot of water, like I mean A LOT of water, on our property. Unfortunately a lot of that water was in our horse paddocks.

You know what doesn’t go well together? Horses and ice. And when we got another quick and hard freeze, our paddocks became mini frozen lakes. ACK!!! No turn-out for horses means sad horses, and sad horses means sad Meredith. I’m very blessed to have the indoor riding arena so each group of two got two runs per day, but it didn’t help me to feel better, because I knew that they really needed the movement of being outside during the day.

I don’t know why it takes me longer at times to bring my problems to God, but I think it’s because I allow myself to be convinced that this isn’t really a problem worthy of God’s time and attention. But who am I to tell God what’s important? So finally Saturday night I told God how I was feeling.

How many times has God used the people in my life to solve my problems? I ended up chatting with a horse friend later that day (named Karen) who suggested we salt the paddocks – great idea! Why didn’t I think of that? We salted, and the next day I was able to get the boys all out in the afternoon for some fresh air.

That night we got a deep freeze and snow – like the kind of weather even salt won’t help with. So now I had snow on top of ice!!! Treacherous for humans, I can’t even describe how dangerous that is for spindly legged, creatures with an innate desire to kill/injure themselves. Back to my friend who suggested plowing my paddock.

Thank you Jesus! I plowed my paddock and by then it had warmed up enough for the salt to work again, so the boys had a nice, clean, wet, but non-icy place to spend their afternoon.

The crazy part about this is that it wasn’t until this morning that I was finally able to recognize God’s hand in all of this. His answer to my prayer was my friend. How many times has God answered prayers through the people in your life and you missed seeing it?

Thanks be to God for reminding me that if it’s important enough for me to worry about, then it’s important enough to bring it to him in prayer.

Have a fabulous day and God bless!

Meredith

Know who your friends are.

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The fact that I haven’t written on this blog in six months is a testament to just how busy our lives have been. The summer saw us building fences and barns; finally planting our hay fields and pastures and running…always running.

Now that things have opened back up again Dave started going back to church. I’ve been a few times, but honestly, I keep saying that I’ll go back to church when the the barn is done. I just don’t have time. The exterior was done months ago, but we’ve been focused on building stalls, hay lofts, running water lines and electrical lines and getting concrete.

Throughout this entire process I’ve felt so blessed, so good in my relationship with God. But, we forget how easy it is to just let it slip away. It’s death by a thousand tiny cuts of the string that ties your heart to Him.

Our barn is almost finished, but doing construction at the beginning of winter is not ideal. We had a to dig a trench down the middle of our driveway to run the electrical lines because it was the only spot dry enough. It completely destroyed our driveway. I cried for a day after that. We’ve had so much rain and wet snow it’s been almost impossible to get the floors firm enough to do the concrete, and then I found out the concrete needed to be higher up my stall walls than I had planned for. More tears and possibly time in bed was the result of that news.

Coming to the end of more than a year of constant building has taken it’s toll on me, mentally. I just want to be done. Finding out our concrete pour was now delayed because of the coming cold front…where was God in all of this?

But that’s the thing. God is constant. He is, was and always will be. It wasn’t that God had stopped being a part of my building process, it was that I had stopped including him. I had stopped trusting him.

Not once, like NEVER EVER during the building process did God let me down. We had one of the wettest summers on record here in Ontario. And yet, when I needed things to be dry so that they could pull the cover on my barn, dust was blowing. Thank you, Jesus. There are too many other moments just like that over the summer for me to document. People would show up at just precisely the right time, I got deals I didn’t expect or look for. God has had his hand in every aspect of our farm. So then why did I stop trusting him now?

It is so easy to get so caught up in the trees of your life, the things that you are doing, that you miss the forest. This past month I’ve been so busy “doing” things that I forgot the one who helped me do it all. You tell yourself I’ll read my Bible tomorrow, or I’ll go to church next week. But in the end, what you are really doing, is allowing the world, your “things” to come between your relationship with God.

God wants to be your best friend, the one you turn to in good times and bad. Yesterday I was miserable; wallowing in my misery, miserable. Sometimes, I listen to music when I’m doing my stalls. As I was choosing my music, a name came into my head; Jason Gray…

When I lose my way
And I forget my name
Remind me who I am
In the mirror all I see
Is who I don’t wanna be
Remind me who I am
In the loneliest places
When I can’t remember what grace is

Tell me, once again
Who I am to You, who I am to You
Tell me, lest I forget
Who I am to You, that I belong to You
To You

Just reading those lyrics again today brings tears to my eyes. God loves us SO MUCH!!! Losing my way, putting my relationship with God on the back-burner…for me that is my loneliest place.

Thank you, Jesus, for reminding me who I am to you and who you are to me…my best friend.

God bless,

Meredith

I was truly terrified!

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Fear is a word I have become intimately knowledgeable of this year. I’m talking, overwhelming, stomach churning, can’t breath, real fear. We’re talking a rocked me to my core, and made me question life decisions kind of fear, I would even say I was terrified. But guess what?! It was the type of fear that isn’t based on actual reality, but on a series of “what ifs”; a fear of the unknown, and I was caught completely off guard when it happened.

There is still so much going on in our world to cause us to be fearful, anxious, stressed. My personal strategy has been just to focus on my small little niche of the world and shut out everything else: I can’t change it anyway. But, sometimes the world breaks through and forces itself upon you; the threat of more lockdowns, tracking apps, arguments to vaccinate or not, doctors threatening to deny care to people. Never in my wildest dreams could I have imagined how divisive our world would feel. That’s the point of fear – to makes you like the world is against you, to make you feel isolated and alone.

There is a song by Zach Williams called “Fear is a Liar”. How much do we need that song now? How much do we need to be told that our fears are lies?

This summer, in the midst of a chaotic world, God has shone his light into my life on a daily basis; reminding me that He is with me, walking beside me, holding my hand. Let me give you an example. Last week, after almost a year of waiting, our hay field and horse pastures were finally planted. We have had gorgeous sunny days since then and three nights of rain. I can only call this a miracle and a blessing from God. I literally couldn’t have asked for better weather to germinate our seed. Again and again this summer God has made a way for us and our dream.

Over and over again the Bible tells us not to worry. Philippians 4:5-7 “The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Jesus Christ.” This verse isn’t saying God will give you what you ask for, but it does say that reaching out to Him in your anxiety will bring you peace; a peace that transcends all understanding.

When I hold God close, when I turn to Him in my fears and anxiety, when I don’t have enough strength, I feel that peace. God’s got this.

That fear I spoke about earlier…it came over me while I was riding my horse. That fear wanted to deny me something that brings me incredible joy, peace and love. I only know of one way to deal with fear like that; give it up to God. I’ve spent the last two weeks doing that scary thing over and over again. Lots of times I pray as we go galloping off into the wild with no fences or arena walls to “keep me safe” and you know what…”I’m actually having fun!” What fears in your life can you give up to God? What fears can you abandon to find joy?

Even when it feels like the world is out of control, Psalm 46:10 says “Be still, and know that I am God;” Make the choices you have to make, embrace the things that scare you, and trust that God will, can, and is working all things for your good. And here’s that Zach Williams song. I’m totally going to cry my way through it.

May God bless you and keep you!

Meredith

Me and My Big Mouth

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Let me start by saying that life in the country; life on our farm; is amazing. There is not one person in my family who hasn’t blossomed in this environment; in the freedom of the space. But building a farm from scratch does not come without its share of worries and stressors; the biggest of which for me has been financial. There have been many times over the past few months when I have felt my share of anxiety over how quickly our bank account can diminish. I know we’ve planned for this, but it’s still a scary thing to see it happen.

But, as a person of faith, I can’t tell you the number of signs and ways that God continually reminds me that He loves me and is watching over us. From the ease of Everett getting his new job five minutes from our house, to the recent purchase of a harrow for my riding arena. Time and time again God is there, watching out for us, protecting us, reminding us that He is near.

For all that, I have still felt anxious and overwhelmed. I don’t know how you deal with your anxiety, but mine tends to result in me lashing out at the people closest to me – my sweet and caring family. I know I’m doing it, I hate that I’m doing it, but I can’t seem to help myself and so it’s something I continue to bring before God.

Yesterday this was one of my verses – “Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret – it only leads to evil.” Psalm 37:8. DING, DING, DING! My fretting has absolutely resulted in anger and wrath and harmful behaviour. Okay Lord, point taken. And today this was my verse – “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your heats and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7

That verse doesn’t mean God is going to give me whatever I pray for, but it does mean that if I give him my worries and my fears and my anxiety he will give me peace. A peace that will guard my heart and my mind and by extension – my mouth. God will give me peace that I can share with my family instead of my fretful wrath.

How many times in your own life have you carried a burden of stress needlessly? I know the truth of these verses because I have lived them in my own life many times over. But still, my patient and loving Father, reminds me when I need to hear it, reminds me to give Him my cares. Today my prayers are about giving up my worries, and embracing the journey that I am taking, knowing that I am watched over, and loved, and protected every single step of the way.

God bless,

Meredith

Count your blessings, not your problems.

Who is it for?

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Yesterday was an absolutely gorgeous day; the sun was shining, there was warmth in the air and the kids were ripping around the fields on the gator. Seeing our kids embracing the outdoors, getting a thrill from something other than a video game was a major factor in our decision to move out of the suburbs. Through out the process of our move I have truly felt God’s hand over us. But, even before we started building I worried if we were making the right decision, if this was simply something I wanted, or if the need to move I was feeling came from God. I did a lot of praying about it and ultimately, there was such a strong feeling in my heart that this was going to be a blessing for us, that we kept moving forward.

Moving to the country has not been without its share of challenges. We are currently living in the middle of a dirt island. When the ground is dry, which thankfully it has been for the past few weeks, the dogs track in a constant steam of dirt and dust. When the ground is wet…let’s just say that washing the floors has become a way of life. The beauty of that is that I’m not alone. One of the many blessings of this new house is that our teenager is now much more a part of the life of the family. In our old home his room was above the garage and he was very isolated. Now he’s a few steps from the living room. I love that I can just pop my head in and chat without having to walk a mile. I also love that it’s made him more connected. He’s surprised me a few time by taking the onus to wash or vacuum the floors.

The new house has been a huge blessing for our youngest too, especially now that we have the gator. He’s excited for his chickens and there is so much out here for him to explore and do. Whether it’s in the mornings when I watch the sun rise, or the evenings when I watch it set; walking in the fields with the dogs, or sitting on the back porch with my family enjoying a lazy Sunday afternoon; through it all I am reminded of how great God is and how very, very grateful I am for his blessings. It’s hard sometimes to know if the desires of your heart are from this world or from God. But my experience has been that if you keep praying about it, God will show you what he wants for you in your life – and he isn’t always subtle.

Have a wonderful day and God bless you.

Meredith

Why are diets so hard?!

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I am finally starting to get back into a routine of reading my Bible every morning. Has it ever happened to you. You think to yourself, I’m good with God, I can take a day off, and so you skip a day, the next week maybe you skip two and before you know it, sitting down and spending time with God on a daily basis isn’t part of your routine, but something that you might not even remember to do. I don’t know why things that are good for us are so easy to let slide, but things that hurt us are the easiest things in the world to keep doing. Ask anyone who’s ever lost a significant amount of weight through diet and exercise. Eating healthy and working out feel so good when you are doing them, but take a week off and it can feel like climbing a mountain to get going again.

I know a lot of people who believe in God, who love God don’t necessarily sit down with their Bible everyday, my parents are prime examples. They go to church, they love God, they live good lives. But as someone who has read through the good book a few times now, if you aren’t reading the Bible you are missing the chance to be reminded by God how much He love you. Here are the passages that were part of my readings over the past few days.

“The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing.” Zephaniah 3:17

“Let us then approach the throne of grace with conidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” Hebrews 4:16

“You are forgiving and good, O Lord, abounding in love to all who call to you.” Psalm 86:5

Now maybe these verses aren’t speaking to you, or maybe they are, the point is that they spoke directly to what I was feeling this morning. You will be astonished to see how often a verse you read in your daily devotions resonates with what you are going through in your life. That’s the power of God’s word! But let’s be honest here, the Bible is a big freaking book. How do you even know where to start? There are so many amazing resources out there on Pinterest and the internet, but to help you get started, here are links to the ones I’ve been using lately. (No I don’t get money for this).

Just like a starting a habit of healthy living to get ride of those extra pounds, starting a habit of daily time with God can help you get rid of all of the extra “stuff” your heart and soul are carrying around.

Surrender yourself to the experience of being spoken to by your heavenly Father through his word. I promise you won’t regret it.

God bless,

Meredith

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Scripture Writing Plan — Revive Refresh Renew

Who’s to Judge?

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I don’t think that I am alone when I say that I can often times be my biggest critic. As a writer it can be hard to learn to let go of a piece of writing and say that it is “good” enough. I’m even more critical of my lack of patience, quick temper, lack of will power. And don’t you find that in those times when we feel the most out of control in our own lives, those are the times we tend to be the most critical of others? As the Covid-19 pandemic follows us into the new year, we judge people for their use or non use of masks, social distancing, willingness to get the vaccine. Sometimes it feels as if our days are filled with nothing but continuous opportunities to pass judgement – on others and ourselves.

Yesterday was not a fabulous day for me. I’m definitely feeling the pressure of packing up our house over the next month for a move and worrying if the new house will be ready. Sometimes I just feel so frustrated by the limitations we are all living under; about not be able to just live my life and get stuff done. I hate it when I feel that way. I hate the way it makes me aware of the darkness in my soul when I give in to my anger and frustration. Remember that whole judgement thing I was talking about…

One of my goals for this year is to get back to reading my Bible daily. I sat down this morning and looked at it – five different sticky notes projecting from the top – unable to decide where to begin. My favorite gospel is that of John. It feels as if it was written by someone who knew Jesus intimately – who loved him and just wanted to share the “good news”. Here’s what I read almost immediately: “I am not seeking glory for myself; but there is one who seeks it, and he is the judge.” John 8:50

But as soon as I read this I though, WAIT! this is a contradiction to something I remembered reading last week. So I went back through my notes and found this: “Moreover, the Father judges no one, but has entrusted all judgement to the Son…” John 5:22

Jesus said both of these things and it got me to thinking…he’s telling us in John 8 that God is the judge, but he has also told us that God judges no one. Think about that, a judge who has far more right to pass judgement upon us than anyone on this earth, including ourselves… who judges no one.

So many times in the past religion has been used as a weapon to control people, to make them feel shamed into believing. But Jesus is telling us here that God our Father judges no one. I’m not saying that I believe that means you can go ahead and do bad things without recourse. Jesus goes on to say in John 5:30 “By myself I can do nothing; I judge only as I hear, and my judgement is just, for I seek not to please myself but him who sent me.” But the solution to judgement is so simple – it’s just belief. “I tell you the truth, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life and will not be condemned; ” John 5:24

We need to be kinder to ourselves. God doesn’t need us to be perfect or without flaws or sin, he took care of that when he sent his only son to die for us. He doesn’t want to judge us – he only wants to love us. All we need to do is accept the gift of his love.

I need to be kinder to myself. I’m human, I’m going to have good days and bad days. There are days I’m going to scream at my kids and fight with my husband. There are days when I’m going to be rude to a stranger, not because of anything they have done, but because of where I’m at. I am as far from a perfect person as it is possible to be…thank you God that you don’t need me to be perfect to love me.

I hope and pray that each of us have a day where we are kind to ourselves. That we have a day where we allow God’s love to fill our hearts with peace and joy and wash away the judgement and self-doubt that darkens our souls.

God bless,

Meredith

HE IS RISEN! ALLELUIA!

I can’t recall a weekend in recent memory when I have shed more tears or felt more overwhelmed.  This Easter weekend I have watched parking lots fill with people who can’t afford to feed their families.  I have watched western nations burying bodies in mass graves.  In these times of sadness, and untold sorrows, I feel keenly how much miss my church…my church family.

Perhaps your heart, like mine so desperately needs the joy this Easter morning brings with it, the celebration of our risen Lord, the celebration of his victory over death, at a time when it feels as if we are surrounded by it.

To steal a phrase from our beloved Archdeacon Matthewman at Church of the Ascension, “the shadow of Christ is over all of us today, even those who don’t know it yet”.  I pray that, much like his disciples did that Easter Sunday morning 2,000 years ago, we are all able to fully experience the wonder, and the joy and the miracle of His resurrection.  Christ is risen, Alleluia!!

God bless,

Meredith

 

 

BECOMING SIN

I’ve spent the last couple of days reading the gospels leading up to Maundy Thursday, reading about that final night Jesus spent with his disciples.  It’s painful to read about the struggle the Son of God went through on that final night.  We all have free will, it is up to us to choose how we behave in any given situation (even if sometimes, like children, we blame our behavior another person).  But sometimes we forget that Jesus had a choice to make too.  On that final night, in the garden of Gethsemane he prayed and pleaded with his Heavenly Father “that if possible the hour might pass from him, ‘Abba, Father’, he said, ‘everything is possible for your.  Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.’  Mark 14:36

Jesus was the incarnation of God, the embodiment of our Heavenly Father in human form, and he had very real, very human feelings.  I can imagine on that night the pain he was feeling in his heart knowing that he was going to have to leave his beloved friends.  The fear and trepidation he must have felt knowing the cruelty, and suffering that was to come both on the cross, and before.  But I think sometimes we forget the biggest burden that he would carry for us.  “He became sin, who knew no sin.” 2 Corinthians 5:21.  And even still, despite all the prophecies, despite everything leading up to this moment, He had to choose.

There have been many times that I have tried to get my head around what was so special about the death of Jesus that we continue to honor and worship him thousands of years later.  He certainly wasn’t the first person or last person to die cruelly for his or her beliefs.  So then why?  Why did an entire religion rise up around this man?  Why was his death special?  I’ve only recently come to understand that a large part of it isn’t just the resurrection story.  There’s something more here…Because he BECAME sin.  Jesus was the Son of God, part of the Trinity.  He was part of the brightest, more pure, most loving force in the universe and he gave all of that up for us, and went down into the heart of darkness.  The weight of my own guilt can be crushing sometimes. But Jesus, all at once, He became every dark deed everyone of us has done, or will ever do.  He became murder, corruption, filth, greed, lust, lies…He allowed everything that was pure and beautiful about himself to be stripped away for our sake.  He allowed himself to be separated from his Heavenly Father and given over to evil for our sake.  I wonder if when Jesus was praying in the garden if it wasn’t the cross he was asking to be saved from, but the suffering, the agony of not feeling, of being in the presence, the peace, the love of God?

So as we walk these final few days toward the joy of Easter morning, I want to keep my mind on the gift that was given to each and every one of us upon that cross.  Freedom.  No more is our path to God blocked, but the blood of the lamb has paved the way for each and every one of us to experience the peace, the love, the presence of the One, True and Ever Living God.  Praise be to God.

In Jesus’ name,

Meredith